"We should totally all just stab caesar!"-L

Disclaimer - not so funny as the rest of our posts but just as important.

Throughout the years I've been known to be a bit of a bully; my anger is possibly my most common trait, big thanks to my dad for giving me this immaculate trait! No really! Cheers! Apple never falls far from the tree.. just like my drinking eh!


I can admit that I've been the bully at times. I have some sort of anger issue where I sometimes get so mad that I want to make people hurt.
So much so I was asked to 'leave' my high school, obviously I didn't so they sent me to 'hey girlfriend!' for female bullies of my town.. bit funny I sat there listening to psychopaths who beat their parents and what did I do?
Told a girl she didn't need the cirvical cancer needle cos' she was in fact a man. Oops.
Maybe I had done numerous other things such as call a girl fat so she smashed me across the face with a keyboard. She literally did get expelled for stealing phones and making a 'kill list.' I and all my friends were on top of that list.
I got atleast 12 people to jump on my best friend cos she said she was claustrophobic and I didn't believe her, turns out she was VERY claustrophobic she had a panic attack and cried for 45 minutes.
I've been in fights which is one of the most unattractive thing ever for a female (unless mud/jelly is involved, or it's wrestling or boxing tae kwon do or some form of sport... or any time where there is a high possibility of lesbian action).
I met one of my best friends when she attacked me in year seven because I supposedly made up a game at a party called -insert her name- slutty dancing competition.
I once mocked a girl for having her boobs shown around social media. I think that is my most regretful act to date. To a girl who was my good friend and had never done anything wrong to me. I cant even give you an apology, all I can say to you is this: karma sure did punch me in the face ... actually more like KING HIT me in the face -when photos I had sent to my boyfriend were uploaded onto Facebook where my mum, dad, sister boss co-workers and friends saw.

When I look back on my life I'm sad about this and no where near proud. I think that perhaps I just hurt people to see if they come back.. to see if they fight for me? That is NOT how life works.
I sometimes wonder what bullying is - a power trip? For attention? I don't know. I do know it's not okay for a student to have suicidal thoughts when seeing you at school every day. :(

I have been somewhat bullied myself, like everyone else on this planet;

I specifically remember my crush once telling me in grade 4, "why do you wear your hair like that? It doesn't look any good! NOT that you look good anyway!" -class laughter- 
Or when he accidentally kicked me in the face with a soccer ball and said "don't tell the teacher!" even though my lip was profusely bleeding. I had to tell a teacher or there's a fair chance they'd notice the blood running from my lip like i had just vampire-sucked a cow dry... and in telling a teacher I was immediately ostracized for days by basically the whole school.
I was blamed for bullying the teacher's daughter when she had in fact kicked my in the stomach at recess. That's right. Kicked.
I was blamed for writing a burn book, I DID NOT WRITE THE BURN BOOK! (I keep mine at home.)
I was often told to "take my pills" -sorry I didn't like putting water in my red cordial and basically imposed ADD upon myself every day.
I was given the nick name Pinocchio in high school and sometimes my only friend was my sister who is probably the person who copped the most bullying from me.

I've been hit by boys and girls, spat at, I've had chunks and chunks of hair ripped from my skull and I have been dragged across dirt and fire by my hair.
Once I was followed with my friends where around 50+ people, including some friends, watched us get attacked or so "bashed" as it was described to me. Eeh classy put that on your resume! Also people filmed this.
I've had restraining orders on people and I've felt what it's like to loose ALL your friends.



I've lost most people I loved to this horrible trait, almost my family. But. as I've grown older and wiser (in some regards) I've grown up and learnt from my actions
I did a speech in year 12 were I can comfortably say I loved everyone in that year level including teachers! How often can you say that? I like to think that they loved me just as much in return.
I cried at the end of my little speech in front of them and I looked at my parents and I can comfortably say they were too and they were proud.

I'm just so happy I wasn't that girl who used to carve a knife into a table because I so badly wanted to leave school.
I grew up once I had realized I had lost everyone!!! You have to work so hard to get back people's trust and even harder to get back people's respect.
It just happens I was so lucky to also have a very obsessive trait where I do not give up.


The one thing I've learned is that being bullied doesn't give you the right to become a bully.
I remember thinking to myself, I'll show them, one day I will have so many friends!!! And that I do. I've won against them; the bullies never win.


One negative comment can stick so much harder into you than one positive comment.
•An estimated 200 million children and youth around the world are being bullied by their peers.
•Children who were bullied were up to nine times more likely to have suicidal thoughts.
•Peers are present as onlookers in 87% of bullying interactions, and play a central role in the bullying process.

As you get older you will still always come across people who WILL make you feel like you're nothing...
at work, at uni, going out partying! EVERYWHERE.
Find a way to conquer them without being spiteful...

But here's the thing everyone is not always going to get along so just ignore the negativity, as the old saying goes "the hero is the one who doesn't hit back". Ignore it! IGNORE THEM! What will get to someone more than you not retaliating? Where they will just feel horrible later for what they have done. And if they knew how upset something they had said had made you, and if they don't feel bad ablout that, then they're not human! They're voldemort!

XXX

Concluding, I've written some pretty personal things and you may think that I'm weak, but if I have ever hurt or bullied you or made you feel upset:
from the bottom of my heart I give you my most honest and sincere apologies.

Ps. if you ever make me upset all you have to do is compliment me and I will be forever your loyal friend.

Love always -L


“Some people won't be happy until they've pushed you to the ground. What you have to do is have the courage to stand your ground and not give them the time of day. Hold on to your power and never give it away.”
― Donna Schoenrock

“With ignorance comes fear- from fear comes bigotry. Education is the key to acceptance.”
― Kathleen Patel, The Bullying