THAT'S ASSAULT BROTHER - L

Warning; this is not a funny post.

Australia has an extremely high rate of violence against women, I have been actually hit a few times by males... It used to not bother me as much being a feminist activist and all, but there is seriously something wrong with society on the grounds of violence. Most woman, are physically weaker than men and no way should they EVER be touched in such a manner to cause harm or for someone to deliberately try to cause harm to them especially by a male... It's not okay it's an ancient patriarchal trait that should be abolished from this lifetime. 
One day, I was at this party by the river, I was young and my memory is a bit shady but I remember my friend arguing with a boy and he was telling her he would "throw her in the fire".
 I don't know what came over me when I heard this, but I just attacked him like some crazy psycho that I am. I hit him in the face. He grabbed me by the throat and I just remember being dragged along the ground/fire, I wasn't crying and I wasn't screaming but I just specifically remember people egging this behavior on, he had this stupid smile like he was actually doing it to look tough and enjoying it, my friends soon realized what the hell was happening- all female mind you and jumped to my rescue. 
I just cried and cried to my mum at home hugging her, I was a tough kid but it was more the embarassement we just hugged for ages when I told her what had happened and was so upset, she wasn't that angry as I was  trying to protect a friend, I think she cried with me for a bit when I pulled all the hair that had been pulled out of my head  from my pockets to show her I had bruised for weeks under my eyes and scratch marks all over my back ... and guess what I did a year later, I DATED THAT GUY... WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME? LIKE WE FULL ON DATED. WHY WOULD I DO THAT?  (Ugh, lets not even... just... shut up).

I  used to have a family friend that used to hit me when I did things wrong  you know the old back hand and what not and me and my best friend used to joke about all the things he would do to us at school and cry in front of everyone, everyone thought we were actually insane we'd be laughing telling everyone and then we would just cry about it together.
 You know not the full on black eye type shit but it was still the same and it still hurt. I used to hide in our bathroom a  lot and text my boyfriend when I was sad or scared and one time he even saw that guy hit me I remember him telling me that my friend had to hold him back so he didn't attack him. I was at a party last night where that ex boyfriend was, and someone told me to go lie with him and well you really don't have to tell me twice to do things like that so I did, I was just being all cute and hugging him (mind you he hates me), and me being me I just kept doing it anyway and he told me to get away from him but he always does that but this time it was different, someone had an audience. I probs spin this in a much hurtful way then it happened but that's how it happened from my viewpoint. He's friend told me to go upstairs and I was like "Whaaaat, why?" and he just snapped, I swear to fucking Christ he was going to hit me he picked me up and literally threw me outside.  I just started crying and I tried to find my way home but apparently I was 20kms away from where I live Caaaaaaaan youuuuuu saaaaaaay FUCK MY LIFE?  


 My friends beautiful room mate came outside and sheep herded me back inside where I screamed for a good 10 minutes that "I just wanted to go home!" Next morning no one said anything to me, apparently this type of behavior is excusable in this country, again I called my beautiful Mum and she coached me to stop crying and to go back inside and to wait for our lovely friend on the street to come and get us because it was so awkward and sad inside I couldn't stop thinking maybe it wasn't that bad maybe I was exaggerating  but put it this way imagine someone picking up your mum and throwing her outside, that is NOT fucking okay! (if in case you love your mum just at much as I love mine). I text the guy who threw me outside 'remember how you almost punched me/physically abused me' and he replied in retort '...remember that time you exaggerated and lied once again... wen i said please leave me alone about one hundred times and you didn't' No apology I was just called a liar, I think it was the pack mentality thing he had an audience why not succumb to it, I will not ever tolerate being physically abused and can't believe someone who has seen/heard about me being hurt by abuse would succumb to the same, I guess I deserved it HE DID tell me to leave him alone a hundred times, right?
You know from so many different types of abuse I have copped off these pigs, it's all the same exaggerated or not it is disgusting pigful behavior and I will never understand it's roots, why can't people use their words not their fists like educated civilized people. In regards to whether I deserved the behavior I can inform you violence/abuse/bullying is never the answer I have learnt this the hardest way possible, no one in the world should be punished by someone else hands they have a right to their own dignity at all times. 

May we not succumb to thoughts of violence and revenge today, but rather to thoughts of mercy and compassion. We are to love our enemies that they might be returned to their right minds.